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  • 2 months later...

Hey Guys.

Just to stray off topic a bit.

Many of you asked about Khazun's joke site. It is nearly, almost, positively done.

I just need somebody who is wiling to buy 1-2 small ads on the site to help me buy a better script, or somebody who knows php to write me something half decent, and it will be online (refer to appox page 5 from when I mentioned this.)

Just PM me if interested.

Since we are on a trail of lame jokes, let me post my best lame joke.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?

A: Where is my Tractor?

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Here's one called:


Having chosen English as the preferred language in the EEC (now officially the European Union, or EU) the European Parliament has commissioned a feasibility study of ways of improving efficiency in communications between Government departments.

European officials have often pointed out that English spelling is unnecessarily difficult; for example, "cough", "plough", "rough", "through" and "thorough". What is clearly needed is a phased program of changes changes to iron out these anomalies. The program would, of course, be administered by a committee staff at top level by participating nations.

In the first year, for example, the committee would suggest using "s" instead of the soft "c". Sertainly sivil servants in all sities would resieve this news with joy. Then the hard "c" could be replaced by "k" sinse both letters are pronounsed alike. Not only would this klear up konfusion in the minds of klerikal workers, but typewriters kould be made with one less letter.

There would be growing enthusiasm when in the sekond year, it was announsed that the troublesome "ph" would henseforth be written "f". This would make words like "fotograf" twenty persent shorter in print.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be pekted to reash the stage where more komplikated shanges are possible. Governments would enkourage the removal of double letters which have always been a deterent to akurate speling.

We would al agre that the horible mes of silent "e"'s in the languag is disgrasful. Therefor we kould drop thes and kontinu to read and writ as though nothing had hapend. By this tim it would be four years sins the skem began and peopl would be reseptive to steps sutsh as replasing "th" by "z".

Perhaps zen ze funktion of "w" kould be taken on by "v", vitsh is, after al, half a "w". Shortly after zis, ze unesesary "o" kould be dropd from words kontaining "ou". Similar arguments vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

Kontinuing zis proses yer after yer, ve vud eventuli hav a reli sensibl riten styl. After tventi yers zer vud be no mor trubls, dificultis and evrivun vud find it ezi tu understand ech ozer. Ze drems of the Guvermnt vud finali hav kum tru.

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