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I am back again now with article reviews. Currently I intend to point out problems with the current articles to show the needs and hope to with time adjust them. For the moment I have looked into the Athenian articles.

History Articles Still Needed

Athens:
Prodomos: Too general
Trireme: Too long
Lithobolos: Simply explains the mechanics. Compare to Oxybeles.
Epibates Marine: No Article
Themistocles: Alter "whom" to "who" in first sentence. Further alterations could be done to improve this.
Pericles: Too short. An article was written by me that should fix that.
Iphicrates: No article
Oikos: Too general for Athenians.
Agros: Olive growing is a form of agriculture.
Apotheke: Too self explanatory
Outpost: Again too self-explanatory and not relevant
Palisade: Self-explanatory
Limen: Focus more on Athens
Khalkeion: Does not specifically inform about the metallurgy in Athens
Pyrgos: Self-explanatory
Pylai: "pierced" is not a very good description in the first sentence. Perhaps "dotted?"
Theatron: Refer to the theaters as Athenian, not Greek.
Parthenon: No article
Silver Owls: Refer to the coin as "obol," the proper title.
Iphicratean Reforms: No article
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History Articles Still Needed

Britons:
Epos: Fragment for second to last sentence: I would recommend combining it as a descriptive clause with the sentence before.
Gaisaredos: It would be advisable to be more specific as far as the pronouns are concerned for coherency's sake. I could otherwise be difficult to understand.
Druides: Parallel structure for the list: I keep the plurality the same during it.
Curoca: The tense changes from past to present tense. This is a distracting issue.
Uertamika Kilngetoi: The tense again changes. Staying in past tense would be advisable.
Carbanto: Remove the commas from the second and third sentences.
Simbalos: The word plough is spelled in the British way, which is not proper considering that some words have been changed to the American spelling. I would recommend having one or the other spelling form be used instead of both.
Ovidos: No article.
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  • 2 years later...

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